I shouldn’t post this.
Or rather, I shouldn’t need to post this. The blog has just launched and I’m overflowing with things I want to write about. I have 6 drafts either sketched out or half written waiting to share with all of you. Yet here I am, writing to you and saying I have nothing to publish this week.
Why not?
I did some gaming.
Was I too frivolous with my time?
No. that’s not it.
Am I or a loved one suffering from some physical affliction that isn’t allowing me to finish even one draft and get it out to you?
Surprisingly enough, no, that also isn’t the reason.
So, If I’m not struggling with the ideas and have the time and ability to accomplish my goals, what is the issue?
The answer to that is…
I don’t know.
Suddenly I find myself suffering from writer’s block. Not the inability to come up with ideas – like I said, I have a ton of them – but the inability to write about those ideas. I just can’t seem to get the words out of my head. It’s this terrible battle where I’m forcing them onto the page and the poor innocent words are getting battered and bruised. They end up ugly and clunky and practically unrecognizable. And worst of all, unreadable.
And before anyone says it, I know a lot of writers say that whatever they’ve written is crap even though it’s not. That’s part of being a writer. You hate what you write and think it’s awful, no matter how good it really is. Well, rest assured, this is not that. These drafts read like a bad Tom and Jerry fanfiction.
They. Are. Terrible.
And so, this morning as I sat agonizing over not having something to share, I realized that the act of posting something might actually be more important than what I post. I know that quality over quantity is a thing, and that’s not something I’m trying to disprove here, but there are exceptions to every rule. I feel like this is one of those exceptions.
So often I’ve dealt with writer’s block by not writing and waiting for it to pass organically, but I don’t want to do that anymore. I don’t think I can do that anymore. I’m driven to make this adventure work and my solution is to write about not being able to write until I’m able to write again.
Take that Writer’s Block – you stupid jerk! Go kick rocks, suck an egg, take a long walk off a short pier with concrete sneakers because I’m going to post something this week, even if it’s a post about why I’m not posting.
I hope this makes some sort of sense and isn’t too tough to read and understand. I’m writing it on the fly and decided to only do a grammar and punctuation edit so God help us both.
I’ll be back next week whether or not I have words that work. Until then, I hope you keep twisting all that bad stuff around to make it work for you.
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~K
